Keeping up with the Joneses…
You try to avoid feeling like you have to keep up with what everyone else is doing. Yet it feels hopeless as you take one glance and feel completely inferior.
Within you there is a constant battle – the battle of perfection.
The desire to keep up with the Joneses is deeper than the stuff that is required. It is the thought that by doing so, your life will be more perfect and put together.
People respect that – they respect people who have it all together. …or so you think.
In this struggle for perfection, you are perpetually exhausted and feel all over the place without a real sense of purpose.
You yo-yo between determined cleaning streaks and overwhelmed netflix binging. Every type of list imaginable litters your desk in an attempt at organization, and you have 10 books on taking care of a family and maintaining a home on hold at the library.
Despite all of the work you are doing to attain this perfection you feel less put together and more frazzled, less respected and more insecure.
If you are completely honest, you are afraid of what would happen if people could really see how imperfect you are. You are afraid of the rejection that will come if you don’t agree on every point, or can’t live up to the ideals that are so prominent in the lives of others around you.
But what if that wasn’t the point?
In Romans 15:2-3 we read:
Each of us must consider his neighbor’s good for the purpose of building him up. Even Christ never sought to please himself, but, as it is written, “The insults of those who insult you have fallen upon me.”
Who are our neighbors? It’s not just the people we are trying to imitate and subconsciously please – the family next door, or the mom on SM. Our neighbors are also those who are closest to us – our immediate family.
It’s okay to do what is best for your family even if it doesn’t seem to measure up to what others are doing.
Instead of comparing your lifestyle with that of another family, start comparing your actions with the priorities of your family and the areas where you have discerned where God has called you to.
At first it will feel foreign and you will want to turn to see what the others are doing. Stay in your lane, and look to God and what He has placed before you in your family, in your gifts, and in your circumstances. Then, one step at a time, live the life that He has called YOU to live.
As you learn to do this, you will grow in faithful confidence, be more and more aware of the needs that do need to be addressed, and take purposeful action while staying grounded in Christ.
You will find more fulfillment in looking to what God thinks of you instead of trying to do what you think others think you should do. …and you will find that you will also bring encouragement to those “others” along the way, because no one lives a completely perfect life no matter what it may look like to you on the outside.
It’s okay if you still feel a little unsure.
In Resurrected Motherhood, we will walk this journey together – understanding priorities, placing them in their proper order, and learning how to live them out each day with that faithful confidence.
Even if that fear of rejection decides to rear its ugly head, we will tackle it head on, together.
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